Informed by our discussions with archivists from Derby Museums Trust about collecting and categorising artefacts, we have developed our own 'collections' of memories, events, performances, training, holidays, injuries – to name a few – that have informed the generation of new performance work. Examples of collections by each of us are offered below.
Being Unsure
Underconfident
Dark, torch, Jill Deacon
feeling versus knowing....
Wanting to bring in that section of jumping but knowing it didn't really work
Do we have the time to change?
Not wanting to offend but needing to be said
Small pain in left knee - how's that happened? - on the plane, the yoga, the work, the mat, the floor?
Holiday walking on Ikaria, getting lost, heat and heat stroke, T shirt on head
water on T shirt, red frog, black and red caterpillar, think I should climb the cliff to look for a path.
Waiting at the side to enter. Now? No. Now? No. Now? No. Now? Don't know.
When is the right time? the last time? the next time? Do we have time?
Another gin or should we go?
Oooohing and aaaarhing!
It's make your mind up time.
Stay? Go?
My unsureness is generally to do with other people,
unsure
uncertain
unclear
A List For Today - A Triptych:
A Monday
Can we begin now?
Where are we right now – what are we bringing to this
Moment
Moving as we do
What are we arriving with?
Arriving – carried/contained within
Structure
Tissue
The light has dimmed and I am thinking of what happened in winter times
Back then
Cold studios
Empty spaces
It’s hard to remember sometimes
There is a pressure sitting here, typing
So I am recalling last night
That is as far back as I can manage right now
Switching positions
Heat shifting
Seeking a more comfortable position
Seeking a pressure that is more reassuring
It seems that this is quite
A
Full place to be right now
The solitude of the time to write the solitude of the time to open the book the solitude of the time to do or not do
If I had a pencil I would draw it putting in shade and dark & light – or would those be curtains….
Writing is a difficult thing to do when they’re talking- I wish they’d be quiet, but I will be quiet
What is quiet
Quiet is how you have to be when you do life modelling – in a black leotard a pair of tights – I was crap, but they gave me £12.00 & refreshments and all that time ago that was quite a lot of money
Is quiet the same as stillness but in a different scape?
Observing class when I had shin splits, 1985? Watching and writing benesh notation, stick people on lines. I lent a lot, I learnt that I don’t want to be a benesh notator.
Walk over
Talk over
An interview on the radio about some work I was doing – with Quick Shifts I think.
Trying my hand at stand up comedy, a couple of times, haven’t done it since (or not for money anyway).
Watching beautiful Balinese dance
A List Made In Extreme Brightness
A mini(-ature) mountain range
A pile of rubble
A book
Scrambling, slipping
Backwards on scree
A slate grey pool
Marram and its scratch
Small red trails
Bright light
Sunshine
A blind spot
A soft spot
A marshmallow
No go
No show
Honey spread
Soft white bread
Ham paste
Golden wonder
Struck as if
By a meteorite shower
On the back of the head one small bump
An Objective List
Sad Café – on constant play in the smallest room at 10 Scholey Avenue – don’t move your feet or an arm will jump
One small beer at 8.15am – the café in Barcelona where we had breakfast number 2 – one sweet roll and a long black coffee
Weak sunshine
Large glasses – reflecting always - good
One silver head – a point of discussion
Two red and yellowed eyes – hopefully never discussed but maybe provoking disgust
One angel
Two platform shoes
A pair of white tights
Below a bouncing halo on Carre del Carme
A blue wax bowl, scooped out, light filled
Orange ones burning in the chilly field - a Norwegian tomato farm
The gas man
The farmer
The son
The past and the present overlooking the sea
The stink of the loo – poo & pee compost
One espresso – 3.15pm
Lunch - 11.45am, always
One man, spinning on his head
Watching
Balancing
Ready to topple, cava-filled into the sea over the wall with Freddie and Montserrat
Past the big curve
Looping the loop
Doing the do
Small envelopes, long letters, a marathon
The diving board
Nameless books, nameless novels, misnamed garments, an armadillo, a carapace, a mistake
Kept, celebrated, a convent
Mister Sock-man
Sunday’s Collection – a surprise
Peering in the dark; surprisingly pale blue, aqua, peach, watery yellow; absence of black
jangling
On the outside
Steaming
Strangely smelling
A pot – small: fresh fruit
Squeaky floor
Thin curtains: which city light and dark shown on panels
Through the window
Small gestures
In
The mirror – hoping, discerning, deleting
Turning back
Dropping round
Catching pull away
a small puff of dust from the feet to the wrist
2 birds
one pigeon + the maggots
zero; four; nine; twelve; fifteen; twenty-one; twenty-two; twenty-seven; thirty-five; thirty-eight; forty; forty-two; forty-seven; forty-nine; fifty
novelty, thick, pastel, bold, striped, soft tops, gripping ankles, sliding in forcing out one birth near death – hold close – to me
A Companion List
One black dress, and one with a sash
The shoes, the pants, eyeliner
2 red dots
Tight grey cords, purple top – cap sleeves
Satin, sateen, plus cotton
Under skirt; over dress
Smudged
2 big rollers
black trousers a few pairs
1 jacket - again bottle green
swooping & diving, one hand behind the head: Philadelphia – shoes on, not shoes off
bagels, too many, cream cheese cranberry jelly
fast lifts, high release, Thomas Tallis
sleeping
soundly
1 minute
turquoise
silky
cropped, blouson leg
a hand whisk, a blender, the hoover, the dog locked away
whirling, one mad cat
long curtains
a bit chilly, in the dark - chair placed behind the kitchen
lots of candles + angels – too many
but watching
waiting
lying
not lying
visiting
usurping
showering
a gift
an ending?
in a tunnel or the arsenal, spare change on the suitcase
great stunts
best moves
insipid moves
spinning on a rope
running up the wall
hoping
the end
was
secured
my mum
and my dad
sitting, hunched
porticoe
portcullis
done
the beauty
of
forgetting
The Beginnings of a List (or a Listed Collection – the Backstory)
One birdcage – not real
Hand guards
Elastic braces
v-neck
tea-bag died rags
a pierrot mask
red lipstick
red and black painted rags
blue wrapover – handed down
slouchy woolly warm up stuff – mulled wine & black
black tights – high waist
leotards – navy blue; royal blue; fuschia; black; turquoise (wrestler); red chevrons; bottle green velour; brown seal skin – Carita House
unitards – bright pink; black; navy blue; mid blue; jade green; ruched; unruched
hair like a mushroom, 2 flicks, always a fringe, number 2 (very short), wavy long, longer, curly, and grey – sometimes up, sometimes down
several houses
numerous theatres
outdoor sites
Japan; USA; Canada; France; Germany; Belgium; Norway; Sweden; Portugal; Slovenia; UK; Italy; India; Hungary; Ireland
On the tv, on film, live
A Persil box
Nicky S x 2
Betsy
Jamie, Fiona – Poppy and a panda, Anton, Milly, the Reckless girls; Norwegian craziness
Contained within and without,
always
myself
a vessel
A prism
A glass block
A shape shifter
Laughing – a lot
A List Made With A Grey Sky
Petals with a peculiar smell
One small trolley
A dinner wagon
Aperitifs at 6.30
A vase – fat, rounded
Some coloured glass
2 green velveteen cushions
no rabbit
6 chairs – Bell Street, Salvation Army
Another peculiar smell
Old pee
Back against the nostrils
4 castors
a pulley
the pan with the black handle – slightly bellied-bottom
slightly out of time
holding the space – always
the noise of the rolling
lights – small and bright
everlasting
bulbs
a balcony
backs
spines
remembrance
dulce
et decorum
est…
the wealth
of
the thing
the
breath
of
the thing
gulag
how to be
how to go
how to show
how low
ho ho
was it mine or yours
is it hours of passing of time of weight of body of lips of hair
one bruise
one scar on the top of the head
waterfalls
caves
a bruise on my tooth
loosening
dropping
swooping
5p
softly closing
muffled
muffling
in a jar at
the side
of the bed
my money for
running
playing
escaping
shutters
Mr Ripley
The sun
My ending, unknown, ever-knowing, not knowing
Unable to resist the lilt
The totally tropical taste
The chance to reveal
The chance to subsume, consume, presume but never assume – it makes an ass of you and me…
Too much
Extraneous
Lessening
Loosening
Leftovers
Offcuts
Brown serge
Broderie anglais - white
Seersucker – lemon + pedal pushers to match
Poplin – Mary
Small check – green white – red pox
A game – rummy
Another jar
½ pences – winnings
a bet
a joke
a laugh
the back bedroom – today chilly
last night toasty
the big bulb in the cage beneath the candlewick
pink – small green and white buds
she tips
she picked me up – the strength of the lion
2 wrists
2 ankles
and dropped me onto the bigger pink buds
thudding on the back, no wind, only wind
hot air
laughing
crashing
stirring
the cherry blossom
right now, still in leaf
In Advance Of Snow
Asymmetric hair cut
Teal blue: cockatoo
Slouchy ankles
A mid point
At the waist
Skimming
Sliding
Screaming
Tubular
Bells
Jean Michel Jarre
One group
Latent heat
School base
Home base
No feet, plastic bags
Chicken pox – too much heat
Pandora’s box
Evita
Song and Dance
Movement With Music
No sound
Politesse
A demonstration
A demon – on skates
One tree
Tall
Reaching
Sheds…
Advancing Snow:
Ready to go
Many rooftops
Tiles
Small branches
An overhang
Few berries
Many on the branch, not much snow on the floor
A robin
A gust
Gusting
Gurgling
Gurning
Talk to the baby
No spots left
Dabbing
Dawdling
Rowing the boat up the hill
Janine Robert Debbie Claire
The children in the book
How many words
To
Let me know
Where we are
Where we are at
A sponge
Soft
Sopping
Absorbant
Reluctant – perhaps
Puerile – sometimes
Nonsensical
Appealing
Inhabiting
Co-habiting
Existence is mine
Blue John
Agate
Chalceodony
Amethyst
Pearl
Lili
A list too long and maybe for another day
A complex, shifting, tangible, intangible kind of a list
A list that’s living
A list that’s me
A list for giving
Tearing it up
Ripping the
Temple
Curtain
On
One
Forgetting
Fogging
Emerging
Imminent
Drooling
Dribbling
2 minutes since then
2 minutes from now
Shifting like sand
A space
A bubble
A reconsideration…
In Advance Of Snow:
Asymmetric hair cut
Teal blue: cockatoo
Slouchy ankles
A mid point
At the waist
Skimming
Sliding
Screaming
Tubular
Bells
Jean Michel Jarre
One group
Latent heat
School base
Home base
No feet, plastic bags
Chicken pox – too much heat
Pandora’s box
Evita
Song and Dance
Movement With Music
No sound
Politesse
A demonstration
A demon – on skates
One tree
Tall
Reaching
Sheds…
Advancing Snow:
Ready to go
Many rooftops
Tiles
Small branches
An overhang
Few berries
Many on the branch, not much snow on the floor
A robin
A gust
Gusting
Gurgling
Gurning
Talk to the baby
No spots left
Dabbing
Dawdling
Rowing the boat up the hill
Janine Robert Debbie Claire
The children in the book
How many words
To
Let me know
Where we are
Where we are at
A sponge
Soft
Sopping
Absorbant
Reluctant – perhaps
Puerile – sometimes
Nonsensical
Appealing
Inhabiting
Co-habiting
Existence is mine
Blue John
Agate
Chalceodony
Amethyst
Pearl
Lili
A list too long and maybe for another day
A complex, shifting, tangible, intangible kind of a list
A list that’s living
A list that’s me
A list for giving
Tearing it up
Ripping the
Temple
Curtain
On
One
Forgetting
Fogging
Emerging
Imminent
Drooling
Dribbling
2 minutes since then
2 minutes from now
Shifting like sand
A space
A bubble
A reconsideration…
I looked after my dad this weekend.
He is 90 years old. And a miraculous achievement especially after: a rural childhood in extreme weather conditions, combat in a world war, a refugee camp, repatriation, a mining career handling dynamite, a burst stomach ulcer, a new career in a cotton mill, 3 kids including a toddler in his mid fifties, a removed gallbladder, a lot of fatty meats, most veg as a garnish, almost no fruit (the odd grape), fluid intake only coffee, beer and red wine, a 78-year smoking habit.
Not having a car probably helped, we walked everywhere.
He now moves very, very slowly. He has a stick.
He stayed over at our place. Our place has 4 floors and many stairs including a tripping hazard consisting of 2 cats.
His body a marvel, I look at it and think that that is where I came from and where I am going.
He needs a lot of help to get into bed. And stand up. His frailness contradicts his immense physical heaviness.
His skin is amazing. Kind of paper thin and almost see through and covered with marks from a long life. Age spots, coal seems under his skin, impressive scars. He lets me cover him in Dr Haushka body lotion.
He uses a thing called a nebuliser. This, I think, relaxes his lungs and calms down his hacking smokers cough. It looks a bit like the oxygen masks that drop from the airplane ceiling when you are about to crash land.
I hope I have his smile-y demeanor at that age. He is cheeky.
He is not cantankerous and never complains. He laughs easily.
Conversation is tricky due to a combination of his deafness, forgetfulness (although he did remember his childhood horses names, Zono and Bobby, which is approx an 82 year old memory) and slurring of words.
He doesn’t say much, never did anyway, and his deafness can be strangely selective. Ask him about what he thinks about something and he just smiles and pretends he didn’t hear. Whisper into a bucket in the far corner of the next room “do you want a glass of wine?” and a resounding “yes please” will come booming forth.
At times I wonder what on earth is going on in his head.
He can sit all day long looking at the birds and the cats and generally napping, coughing, smiling, breathing, sipping, watching – god I think he must be really bored. So I think of entertainment. I rig him up to my laptop so he can watch a couple of movies wearing little earphones and the volume up max. For once he could hear the dialogue and the music.
He watched ‘The Sting’ and ‘Raging Bull’ whilst eating fried egg sandwiches.
We are close. A closeness not of words or conversation, but of an immense comfortable-ness in the company of each other whilst walking or moving or doing nothing.
So my tips on ageing are:
Believe me, it’s not that brilliant to be ancient and not in good shape. The body and mind does tend to deteriorate if you don’t look after it so:
Stay healthy physically. Always, always exercise and don’t eat shit.
Develop a passion for reading and the art of conversation. Especially develop a love for talking about abstract ideas and concepts.
Keep yourself perpetually in education or making things so you don’t get bored.
Nice lotion still counts when you are 90.
Pets are good.
So are bungalows.
Love.
As for me, I’d better get a move on so that those cells that make up my father’s body, the genetic heritage of him and my mother, and their fathers and mothers from way, way back in time, don’t completely reach the end of the line. God, all that way, all those thousands of years, for those cells to end their days in ……… Huddersfield?
I am the only one left in my family who can do this, keep these cells going I mean.
I am 40 this year.
Wow.
Iceland
USA
Sweden
France
Spain
Portugal
The Netherlands
Brussels
Luxembourg
Latvia
Germany
Hungary
Czeck Republic
Austria
Switzerland
Italy
Croatia
Macedonia
Greece
Cyprus
Azerbaijan
Russia
India
Bangladesh
China
Taiwan
Hong Kong
Australia
New Zealand
Passport not needed - UK (including Wales, Scotland, Northern Ireland)
Collection of places would like to visit:
Patagonia
Namibia
Japan
Northern Norway
Canada
Broken toes, right foot
Fractured Spine, L5 – a constant
Quadratus lumborum – spasm
Trapezius - spasm
Pulled rib
Busted nose - on stage Riverside Studios
Chicken Pox – Lillian Bayliss,
General flu at various times – spinning snot usually a resulting feature
Sprained ankle - both at different times
Pulled right hip socket
Neck - left facet joints seized up regularly on tour 2002
Inflamed tendon, front of left shoulder (fainted whilst having hammer needle acupuncture combined with cupping, Taiwan - on stage 3 hours later)
Ripped left achilles tendon - onstage during premier in Italy
Both knees joints affected by withering of thigh muscles in the aftermath of above
Right piriformis/right SI joint – tightness/pain
When needed Paramol – brand of codeine that works (in combination with adrenaline) to take the edge off pain of above list
the last Krische
trace the dna
back to Slovenia
highly likely that I will outlive all my family
Group 1
Transformation
Water Sack
Meditative
Between Earth and Sky
Endurance
Sensation
Journey
From the body outwards
Embodiment
Trance
Intricacy
Shifting Sensation of Time
Bodily Experiences
Personal
Finding a Form
Focus
Paying Attention
Hyper Sensitive
Awareness of Environment
Intense
Leave Your Ancestors Behind
Bring Your Ancestors Along
Acknowledge the presence of your ancestors
Response to war
Control
Exploration
Self discipline
Inward focus
Self healing
Self awareness
Listening
Physical listening
Cleansing
Demanding
Infinite
Continuous
Endlessness
Rejuvenating
Freeing
Space & Time
Awareness of Breath
Imagery
Dream state
Kineasthetic
Hightened senses
Offering
Generosity
detail
sensation
detail
Group 2
transformation
paying attention
focus
awareness
strength
meditative state
attention
tension
time
frustration
relaxation
discipline
heightened sensitivity
growth
of the body
grounded
water sack
earth & sky
primal state
presence
attentive
reborn
visceral
repetitive
transcending
personal
fidgety
imagination
authentic
concentration
control
hypnotic
journey
stories
past
present
now
ancestors
war
birth
historical
never ending
relentless
crisis
alternative
trance
atmospheric
environment
desert
water
fluidity
delicate
fragile
awareness
calming
seamless
sound
voice
sickly
dreaming
into the unknown
slow
breath
melting
sensation
paying attention
space
feeling space
“That moment can’t be repeated, but it’s a trained moment, it’s prepared for, and comes out of everything that’s happened before. It can be like you are not even there. It goes right through you.”
“everyone’s an observer including yourself. You’re the activator but you’re also the observer to all this, reacting and hearing what’s happening all at once. You’ve got all this stuff going through you and you don’t stop it and you don’t hold it”. (The Knowing Body: The Artist as Storyteller in Contemporary Performance, 1995)
.... but I would say you pay attention to it.
We are always in relationship.
Sal
Waiting
Underwater
So held and considered
Behind the shoulders
Mud sliding
It did emerge momentarily
Green polo
Black leotard
All her feeling is carried in her upper structure
And her youth is visible right now
Carried forward
With more understanding thankfully
Memory Of Time
Passing Through The Body
Point scan
Circle, cycle, repeat
Capture
Point and drag, point 45 degrees
Fluency and form and roll and bringing in, bringing home
Pipe spine supporting upwards and against to expel and outburst and collect and gather and put out
Tracing and expelling
A recalling of the outdoor spaces Kitty has danced in
A place
A now
2 peas
both green
floating slightly
moving greatly
1 parting 2 parting
flip flap
flip flop
bright sun
straw hat
bench
bark
purr
I’ll take you
You take me
Bow
Wow
Bow
Wow
Donkey
Bow
Wow
A sanctuary
Bow
Wow
A place
My place
In
This
Line
Bow
Bow
Bow
Wow
It’s mine
Desmoine
Enough
Dancing The Endings Of Performances
People I’ve worked with, danced with or been taught by collection:
Laurie Booth
Rosie Lee
Sue MacLennan
Rosie Lee
Claire Russ
Claire Russ
Glasshouses
Kent De Spain
Kerry Francksen
Quick Shifts
Matthias Sperling
Lyndsey Kemp
Steve Paxton
Barbara Dilley
Nina Martin
Diane Madden
Xavier Le Roy
Emilyn Claid
Lois Weaver
Gay Sweatshop
Affair
Not good
JULYEN HAMILTON (capitals not on purpose)
Kirsty Simson
Gregory Nash
Fergus Early
Motionhouse
Lower Left
Leslie Dworkin
Pete Shenton
Rick Nodine
Jo Breslin
Miriam Keye
Eleanor Walker
Caroline Bowditch
Deborah Hay
Simon Ellis
Gabi Reuter
Suzanne ?
Lin Snelling
Mike Huxley
Jayne Stevens
Jovair Longo
Zena Skinner
Marie McCluskey
Terri McCluskey
Pete Purdy
Michael Quaintance
Susie Ater
Tony Thatcher
In advance of snow
Swindon
Okus Road
It’s March, and unexpectedly, very unexpectedly, my Uncle Don turns up on the doorstep.
All the way from Australia.
There’s a song in there. Somewhere.
I remember this because it was snowing in March. And that was two very surprising things to have happened on the same day.
It’s the same Uncle Rowland who played at the Mechanics.
The splosh, the foxtrot
The waltz
A pineapple juice in a small glass glass
Dancing with my sisters, my school teacher, my mum and dad.
Driving back
Swindon
To Baydon and dad switching off the car lights in the tunnel
And seeing it snow on full beam headlights – crazy snow falling falling falling
Falling, Jo falling like crazy skittle.
Advance warning,
Red alert
PVC skirt and footless tights.
Dying pointe shoes blue and feeling radical. Not being allowed to wear them for class.
I want to do contemporary ballet.
What’s that?
I don’t know. Not being able to describe it or even name a company but that’s what everyone wanted to do. And so did I.
Rachel, Kitty, Sally and David
Score #2
Between the brick walls 1 x 5 feet tall
2 feet
4 feet
an an extra inch
precise date and time
2.10pm 1971
I can remember that - uh?
2am
dull
afternoon tea - the body memory of the time
Oldham Royal
ward
name
midwife
N U R I A from Catalunya - the name of a song I think
Josef - not ph
SLOVENIA
a village
a town
an empire
an entirety
they met apparently in
a nightclub
a hotel
the 50’s
the waltz, the foxtrot and whatnot
their eyes met, cigarette smoke billowed, charisma oozed
a trilby
a dapper
a suit
SALECHESIRE
not a clue...
how does it mix together and then pop out in this form
a question forever
they’ve gone
ITALY
BRITAIN
a flash of the festive
Nuria was relly hilarious withou trying to be so
LANCASHIRE
cobbles concrete urban
no flowers, trees, grass
LONDON
countryside
2 feet turning
a remote farm
horse, dog, forest, vineyard - seeping in to your veins and your bones and your muscle and your UK
a big fight
ease in the countryside
ease into the countryside
wear a hat
wear wellies genetic memory Josef’s gait copied
loved
worn
reduced
made now connected connecting connection
he was not a talker
a cough a pause
ELODIA NURIA
how tall was he miner
manual labourer
red t bars
(the dress with the gnomes and the white broderie anglais blouse) flouncing
reddening
relenting
playing
heels tapping
eyes glancing
peering
chase a squirrel
red
grey
EDINBURGH
the one with the indigo florals
the socks with the white pattern
the shoes - schooled
anoraks x 3
hoods x 3
CLARKSFIELD
ELODIA
liberty
gold sandals
size 3
36
smooth
or
not
DUEY
let’s track him down haha
haha
haha
heeheehee
who says so?
he was a dude
a scandalous dude
what did he do
he did the right thing where did he go
S L O V E N I A? EDINBURGH? C L A R K S F I E L D?
2008
DUEY
a ring
a gold one
very fine
a small bobble on top
a gold band underneath 4th Oct 2008
4th Oct 1939
PARIS
ANGERS
WEST
what were the names of those dudes? NI
passport
bank account
C L A R K S F I E L D was on the edge of a huge mountain N U R I A and J O S E F
SWINDON
the tradition of death
the tradition of a burial an earthing
an old potato
a new potato
SPIN
SPAIN BARCELONA
they pile them on top the maze
the days
of our lives
homing
SITNAV SNACKNAV
shuffle
reaching
remembering
is it behind
is it slightly in front of me one thought
one word
emerge
re-emerge
ALICE
COE
stemming
storing
in us
recalling us
emergent us MADELEINE
the cake
the woman
the delicious buttery
salt
fancy
sea
salty
DIJON
always
polish in the vegetable rack scuffed
rebuffed
sloughed
IAN
pushing
scraping
a line....
Sally, Kitty & Rach
& lots of robots
a hurly burly
a hiatus
a horror story
a contemplation
to rumination
the state of the nation
the place of the work the context
situation
the ecology of thinking a cabin
a rock
a place
a situational present and presence a plonking
a disruption
an odd fit
a jarring
a miscalculation
the potential for a misdemeanor
the web of it
the thoughts
the richness of the weave provocations
questions
a primary exploration
a practice for the holding space cycling
recycling
structuring
one still lake multiple reflections the chicken the egg
the silent question and the questioner tell
me
the story
ask me again
the place of the verbal
the moving question
the moving questioner and questionee
a-linear time
a-fixable presence
affirming time and place and 2 owls
grey feathered
black marks
4 hooves - not present flightless
fightless
in dusk
one chimney
pot
preying
praying
fascination faint hearting fair falling
an igloo
a booth
a recess
a wigwam
a treehouse a temple
a whirlwind a tempest
nostalgia
building the new
celluloid film versus digital
the quality of that film takes us to a time and/or a place
Kitty dancing publicly
the private comes to the fore still, not static or fixed
crave or value the private
need the private to remain private to be able to be public
a roller
a Rolls Rolls Royce Rose Royce Roxanne green filters green vinyl the first human motion
mark out the space
steadiness
planting deliberately
finding her own track that’s familiar
and temporally it is stretched slightly
rotating gently at axis points
that recall a track that is familiar - not entirely unknown time turns forwards and backwards - at the same time there is an ease
and the mechanics of the room bleed into the activity a split second of genetic identity
comes forward at the end when she is still
and when she is finding the ending happening
fizzing unexpectedly she is her world bow and arrow ready aim fire
there is a determined miniature car whirring close by and somehow, I think the small child who thinks he is radio controlling the car
is actually driving her at times - the radio signals
are crossing sleeping beauty slippery - well oiled traveling along traveling through traveling
Ballet in the village hall
Mum's american tan tights with the feet cut out and pink and white spotty shorts
Uncle Rowland playing the the piano
Ballet - I was good at the barre work but not the center work
Graham – I was good at the floor work but not at the center work
Jazz – I was good at the exercises but not at the dancing
Saying to my ballet teacher that I had had a big fall as a child and was scared of not being upright – lying about this to my ballet teacher as an excuse to stay upright
Being technically strong
Audition photos for Rambert
Being told to get some attack in my dancing and to go to fencing classes.
I never went.
Good morning Miss Marie
Experiencing improvisation classes for the first time circa 1984 – and I would always be the last one to leave the space
Loving them and being really excited by them
Opal Loop by Trisha Brown
Troy Games by LCDT
Ghost Dances by Rambert
My first experience of dancing on stage was awful – a solo - which I promptly forgot when I got on stage at the Old Town Arts Centre in Swindon. I wore a green jumper under a black leotard. I ran off stage. In the car on the way home my sister said that I was really good and I knew that she was lying. I knew what a lie was.
Maybe that’s why I work with improvisation now!
Pale pink all in one – my favorite
Hot pink plastic sweat pants
Sat in wide 2nd position on the floor – the teacher pokes a finger in my buttocks saying ‘lose that’.
Seeing a solo show by an American dancer – improvised – and thinking what the hell was that? I can’t think of her name right now but it will come to me.
Bad shins splits, really bad shin splits. Twice. 1985. 1987. Unable to walk let alone dance.
I was too tense.
Too rigid.
Too turned out.
Too much smashing my heels into the floor.
Too much not bending my knees.
Too sore.
The Alexander Technique.
Contact improvisation.
Release based techniques.
Have a narrower first position – what?!
Don’t pull your knees up – what?!
And never wanting to look happy when taking a bow at the end of a show in case the audience thought I wasn’t really any good. So they knew that I knew that I wasn’t really any good. (Arts Centre in Swindon related…?)
Sunday 16 Oct, Leeds (ordered by people I’ve worked with, danced with or been taught by)
Laurie Booth
Rosie Lee
Sue MacLennan
Rosie Lee
Claire Russ
Claire Russ
Glasshouses
Kent De Spain
Kerry Francksen
Quick Shifts
Matthias Sperling
Lyndsey Kemp
Steve Paxton
Barbara Dilley
Nina Martin
Diane Madden
Xavier Le Roy
Emilyn Claid
Lois Weaver
Gay Sweatshop
Affair
Not good
JULYEN HAMILTON (capitals not on purpose)
Kirsty Simson
Gregory Nash
Fergus Early
Motionhouse
Lower Left
Leslie Dworkin
Pete Shenton
Rick Nodine
Jo Breslin
Miriam Keye
Eleanor Walker
Caroline Bowditch
Deborah Hay
Simon Ellis
Gabi Reuter
Suzanne ?
Lin Snelling
Mike Huxley
Jayne Stevens
Jovair Longo
Zena Skinner
Marie McCluskey
Terri McCluskey
Pete Purdy
Michael Quaintance
Susie Ater
Tony Thatcher
Joyous moments collection
In Kirsty Simson workshop with someone doing a duet and thinking that I think I have never felt happier when dancing. Absolute joy and elation and happiness.
Shaking, jiggling in unison, like chi quong
Lucia walker and scott clark workshop – funny old church hall near the place, got friendly with a woman who had half an index finger. We stood holding hands.
Measuring in Marfa
Stand up comedy moments – feeling like it’s working and liking it
Timing, beautiful and clever timing, feeling that sensation of joy
Steve Paxton
Renaissance, pete shenton, looking up at him in 90 degrees starting. Short sharp starts.
After dancing
So much.
Hooks\
paul douglas\
invited
change what you do with your legs
into what?
Hooks and teaching and losing the CD of that track.
Music to be murdered by.
Brass bands.
Measuring in Marfa leads to dripping pepper leads to rosie lee and splitting hands as they approach the floor.
Diving, like diving.
White feathers, circles, shifting space and feathers,
9 women in white
saw a photo of this the other day, of me in it.
I:8
Handcuffs and washing up gloves
Terminus terminux – this is the end my friend.
Renaissance, cello and guitar and lip synching.
Lip sinking.
Washing up gloves.
White gloves used in a library for ancient texts,
White rabbits, a graduate who is a magician’s assistant
Don’t forget we can get up and dance to check stuff out in this moment
Recalling watching others,
Seats, red plush. hard backed, stacked
Stacked, stocked,
Four thirty, time for tea.
Garden party in the hot house, throwing cups at each other from behind from off the table, was never good at throwing but that was alright.
Cabbages, red blood, smashing like skulls
Short and punky, pvc skirt, feathers
Feathers feature
Swans and peacocks,
Leotards from primark and peacocks, good quality cotton and they wash ok too
Numerous leotards and tights and
All in ones
Pink, black (wore that one for my Leicester polytechnic audition with an elastic waist band),
Electric blue with one shoulder.
Air on a g string,
Air on very big pants.
Not able to dance with small briefs, I need a large pair that don’t wriggle around when bending over.
Big spender
Only have one or two
Light,
Fly and don’t know that you’re flying (paraphrased wildly!)
Don’t let the audience know that you are moving in a spiral, but move in a spiral
Looking at
Being watched
Watching others
Difficult to stop
Turning whriling dervishes
Sensation
Feeling
Falling
Are we just writing memories?
Tracing my preferences through trisha brown,
Loose limbed with clarity
Lines
Loving lines!!
Horizontal or vertical or diagonal and long and short and thin and fat
Dropping dancer off in the space
Sweeping, cleaning like a brush leaving bits of debris on the floor
A dance for radio
Can you see me, hear me? Do you need to?
Do I forget it? Sometimes…
My body
Is 1mm ahead of me
here-and-there, all-at-once
and the me-driver
my self
is perhaps metabloic
or
something like a human version of snake venom if it was extracted into
a glass
or
testoterone
or
thick yellow liquid anyway
all my body all-at-once
all my past all-at-once
'all my lovers where there with me - all my past and all my future
..... and we all went to heaven in a little row boat'
7th Jan 2017 Silk Mill Derby
this is the version of now
this is the now ..... for now
for me it is not about the new but about the now ... paying attention
to the
right now
the past and the now, right now together in the now
and with the now, with it, is all of the past ... condensed
portable
carried
present
great vistas - carried in your pocket
Walking to school – father/spring blossom and Autumn leaves, snow blizzards, shadows in the sun, vit-c lozenge
Running, leapfrogging over gym ‘horse’
Playground Play - horses and houses with multiple corridors always in the same spot by the inner railings
Skipping Rope skipping
Dancing black cat – swinging long tail
Climbing frame - Spain – gouging skin out of hands by swinging on the bar – imaginary gymnast
Flying out of swing - Spain – uncle popping arm back into socket – I can’t understand them I don’t speak the language, my family are Catalans
Lagging behind dad - walking home from town
Heat the area of pain in my body – like a small animal
In the way of the hoover
Two fingers – jab and reveal Appendicitis
No flashing light or siren – too late in the evening – vomit all over
Mum - 2 am - trolly – dancing eyebrows above face mask – Black bag with tube – hard to breathe - Batman vision swirly 60’s eyes in the lift
Water and ice cubes
Bathtub – nailbrush – scrub harder
Art on the back in soap foam
Scum around the edges
Swing in the Park – very high, almost going over the top
Climbing – staircase bannister - up over – over and back down
Climbing wardrobe - flying/jumping off top onto mum and dad’s bed
Maypole – clog dancing – badminton – reaching – tapping - skipping
Yugoslav folk dance – candle dance, ht wax, chac chac – fast, steps, hopping, skipping
Library books on ballet – living room, holding the back of the dining chair - copying the positions
Dream of taking the ballet shoes on my feet in the dream back into waking life – awoke grasping my feet
It's a most unusual day - Feel like throwing my worries away - As an old native-born Californian would say
It's a most unusual day
Goose – in Mother Goose. Big flipper feet - of old carpet painted bright yellow. Pully at the back operating with left hand the beak – two pullys at the front (right and left hand) opening and closing the eyes
Running in flippers – funny – taking the last bow in spotlight
Running running running skipping skipping skipping jumping jumping jumping
Reaching reaching reaching
Sewing room – pins on floor - Stevie Wonder and Abba dance routines HEAD OVER HEELS
‘I had a very good friend’
Jacquie Pullen - Triplets to hill street blues
La Bouche – Oldham Library – The Oldham Rd, black and white photographic exhibition of boarded up shops and houses travelling from Oldham to Manchester
Jumping whilst kicking leg underneath and starfish hand on head
Mother not amused – pursed lips – hard lips
Paint – gymnasiums - Wildlife
Time out from school
Sheena Simon – Cunningham technique with Richard Alston, a piece that he didn’t choreograph much of
Dutiful Ducks – future teacher pre family
Work experience at 15 – standing in a circle with adults with learning difficulties – this was new
Chac chac
Balance balance – rocking side to side with a syncopated bounce
Candles on palms – hot wax drip on hand
Head veil – moving – spiritual
Holding hands all night long in a winding circle
Trance – togetherness – belonging without speaking
Rocking – swaying – hopping
Blue velvet, red braid, twisted leather
Turning
Surge forward
Surging sideways
Push and drive
Rushing with the accordion
But with very clear and pointed stamps – that said YES and HERE and NOW
Here now and yes this moment all together – doesn’t matter that we speak differently – I belong to this group
A syncopation
A silent rhythm
A way a carrying vibration and drive through the body
As a support
As a trigger
As a drive
And now calmly stepping via walking with ric – very tall
Standing next to height and it’s very calm
And fibernaci
A series of oiled arm rolls
Fists and forearm acting as cogs
Legs below underpinning straight down and planted
And there is a very faint musicality – quiet but oiled, sliding
It feels – proper
It feels ‘intellectual’
I like feeling ‘intellectual’
And then a stepping out pattern – bird like – stalk
And the stalk becomes a kind of wind turbine
And our arms still and straight and up but with momentary flickering signals
Again it feels ‘intellectual’
It feels like Cunningham
It feels intellectual ..
But it seems that it is also funny
And I don’t mind that its funny
I like that it feels intellectual and funny at the same time
And I remember laying carpet tiles wearing a skirt
I am remembering the woods
Beautiful day
Diana’s funeral – so surreal in some ways
Autumn – as leaves were on the ground – but a warm sunny autumn day
Scooter
Walking in a concentric circle with the camera following
Happy then but also with a seed of doubt that this set up wasn’t good for me
Was kind enough – the transaction lacked …. Trust? Respect?
Arriving from Spain
Trying to be upbeat even though my heart had been broken
My value as a dancer shattered
And hiding it well –
Be funny be funny – wry – smart word play – intellectual but funny
But aching – but relieved to be with people who seemed nice
In Advance of Snow
Rutti – screaming – the Indian contingent – never seen snow
Delighted, excited
Infusing their body – the weird jumps on demi pointe
Shobana
A gathering in – a need for work to stop and play to happen
Trancredi
Italian Renaissance music – but with shot silk, dimmed lights, shiva
Which then leads me to Ekatarinburg
And the dark dark snowy wimter
Kaash – with machine guns in the wings trained on the audience
Minus 10 – not so bad, when you get used to minus 4, and 6 points is arbitrary
To get there we take a night flight from Moscow
And we fly through a snow storm
And we are the only plane that lands that night
And we are standing at the baggage reclaim
And lights and theatre equipment starts arriving on the belt
Literally laterns, franells, coils of wire, extension leads the lot
Piece by piece on the baggage reclaim belt
And the hotel doors open out into the corridor rather than in to the room
And I am listening to the Pyramid song over and over and over again
It seems the perfect song for where we are
And we are spinning
And I have just been back there
And it feels fuller now – somehow, in my grasp
And in my whole body
Not in just my
Heel
Or
Arms
Or hands
And I recall that this place back then
Held a grain of
(History)
some kind of fear
some kind of violence
that this violence once dealt, sticks around
as a warning
And somehow this was being repeated
Balancing on the edge of
Hope
& regret
hope
& fear
and that this ‘art’ was our hope right now
That this dancing – was something to look forward to
spinning into nothing
it was
However, new clothes for the emperor
In the city where the emperor and all his family
Were taken into a basement
And shot
Calculated
And we were supposedly dancing
Shiva
The Bhagavad Gita
The epic tale
Where Arjuna
On the battlefield
Is taught
(Realises) his role
How messed up
How brutal
Brutal man
Brutal history
Brutal to elevate it
By calling it art